February 15th 2015
03:53 am
It
was Monday, when I was sitting and watching the television that it struck me “I have
no romance in my life” we all watch movies and read epic, space defying love stories.
I want my life to be like a Shakespearean tale though, with a very big happily
ever after. I want a love story like that of the greats, another Romeo and
Juliet, Lois and Clark, Edward and Bella, Tris and Four, Christian Grey and
Anastasia Steele. Hey, it’s totally not cheesy and that’s what every little
girl dreams about instead I am stuck in this excuse of a marriage with a young
old soul. Seriously, where had the passion gone? Speaking of, I believe it was
never really there in the first place or maybe it’s gone into hiding if so, I
didn’t get the memo.
I
have always been attracted to Robert he was and is in fact a charmer, when we
first met and even more so after the second divorce oh! didn’t I say this is
our third attempt at marriage yes, shocking I know but our tale has been a big
and shall i say very long roller coaster I would admit that the first time
around i married him for just for his money might I say that he is mightily
rich and I went back to him because I had a fear of living alone. The marriage
was initially a business arrangement at least from my side and he very well
knew that I had no feelings whatsoever for him it was in fact a lovely
arrangement, he gets a good loving wife and a gracious hostess might I add with
no questions asked and no expectation whatsoever and I get the security of
being married to a fabulous man.
The
second time around was well like I said because I didn’t like being alone but
between the both of us I missed him. Robert you know is the arrogant,
sarcastic, narcissistic type with plenty control issues which I don’t even know
if it’s healthy I am attracted to but then again we got divorced because we
couldn’t stand each other as we could never see eye to eye on any issue and
being two strong and determined people who always loved getting their way we
butted heads over and over.
I
felt that the right thing to do especially after an awful argument that he won
seriously, he had no decency to let a lady win an argument (what we were even
arguing about, I can’t remember) was to leave him and let him have his way on
his own hence, the second divorce and as they say I felt that the third time
would be the charm and agreed to marry him again after he came begging and
shall I say, Robert NEVER begs. But like I said earlier, I have no romance in
my life and Robert isn’t my prince charming coming to rescue me although, I
would die if he ever got his hand on this diary and read this not that I
wouldn’t say all this to his face but the fact that I have romantic notions in
me *shivers*. I have been said to be emotionally unavailable and I believe I am
very proud of this status.
Okay
I really wanted to write a letter to Robert that’s why I am awake at this hour
at the reading table I have packed my bags as Robert is still asleep and I hope
to slip out as I can’t stand another confrontation with him so my letter, I
want it to be brief and precise with of course the standard it’s not you it’s
me when it really his him so it goes thus,
Dear
Robby, (I love calling him this as he doesn’t like it but I think it’s cute)
It
is said that the third time is a charm but it’s not so in our case I have been
unhappy for a while now and at various time tried to share it with you but you
never listen, you hear alright but never listen and yesterday’s event or lack
of one proves my point. I have done my best to be the wife you deserve but I
don’t believe we were meant to be together. I would always remember our time
together fondly but I believe it’s time for us to move away from this
relationship as it is unhealthy for the both of us. You deserve more and so do
i.
Love, Funke
P.S
my lawyers would see yours to arrange the terms of the divorce. I still get the
apartment in New York right? It is stated in the prenuptial agreement.
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